Parental Alienation: What UK Family Courts Actually Look For

When a child refuses or resists spending time with one parent, allegations of parental alienation can quickly become a significant issue in family court proceedings.

But what does a family court actually look for when parental alienation is alleged?

The answer is more nuanced than simply deciding whether one parent has “turned the child against” the other. The court’s primary concern is the child’s welfare and best interests. It will look carefully at why the child is reluctant or refusing to have contact, the behaviour of both parents, any safeguarding concerns and the impact on the child.

Cafcass now generally uses the term “alienating behaviours” rather than “parental alienation”. It describes an ongoing pattern of negative attitudes, beliefs or behaviours by a parent which has the potential or intention to undermine or damage the child’s relationship with the other parent.

What does a family court look for when parental alienation is alleged?

The court will not simply accept an allegation of parental alienation at face value. It will consider the evidence and, importantly, explore the reasons why a child does not want to spend time with a parent. This can include looking at:

• Whether there is a pattern of negative or hostile behaviour towards the other parent
• Whether the child has been exposed to negative comments or beliefs about the other parent
• Whether the child has been encouraged or influenced to reject the other parent
• Whether contact has been unnecessarily restricted, disrupted or delayed
• Whether the child has been given a distorted or false account of the other parent
• Whether the parent is supporting or discouraging the child's relationship with the other parent
• The child's own wishes and feelings
• Whether there are genuine reasons why the child does not want contact
• Any allegations of domestic abuse, coercive control or other harmful parenting
• The impact of the parents' behaviour on the child's emotional wellbeing

Cafcass guidance makes clear that there can be a number of reasons why a child resists or refuses contact. The court therefore needs to distinguish between alienating behaviours, harmful parental conflict, domestic abuse and situations where a child's reluctance is based on their own experiences.

The child's wishes and feelings

The child's views are an important part of the assessment. Under the welfare checklist in the Children Act 1989, the court must consider the child's ascertainable wishes and feelings, taking into account their age and understanding. It will also consider the child's physical, emotional and educational needs, any harm they have suffered or may be at risk of suffering, and the ability of each parent to meet their needs.

This means that a child's rejection of a parent does not automatically establish parental alienation. The court will want to understand why the child feels this way.

Domestic abuse must also be considered

One of the most important aspects of an allegation of parental alienation is that the court must not assume that a child's reluctance to see a parent has been caused by the other parent. There may be legitimate safeguarding reasons for a child not wanting contact.

Cafcass specifically states that domestic abuse and alienating behaviours can co-exist. It also warns that allegations of alienating behaviour can sometimes be made by an abusive or controlling parent as a way of deflecting attention from their own behaviour. Practice Direction 12J requires the Family Court to identify and consider allegations of domestic abuse and assess their relevance to decisions about child arrangements.